At What Age Is It Appropriate to Let a Teen Go on Vacation Alone With Friends?

Most parents feel comfortable allowing their teenager to take a first trip with friends around 17–18 years old. According to Bulgarian legislation, minors must be accompanied by adults when staying at hotels, so an age close to adulthood is usually when such trips begin to happen.

From a psychological maturity standpoint, it’s best if the first trip without adult supervision happens during the later teenage years. By then, the teen has gained more life experience, can better assess situations, takes more moderate risks, and is more capable of handling unexpected events. Of course, age is just a number—some teens may be ready earlier. That’s why it’s crucial to consider the individual characteristics of the child rather than strictly following general guidelines.

What Are the Main Signs That a Teen Is Emotionally and Mentally Ready for an Independent Trip? How Can We Assess Their Level of Responsibility?

If your child is completely dependent on you—can’t cook or shop for themselves, can’t wake up on time, pack their bag and documents, or manage a budget—then they are probably not ready for such a trip.
On the other hand, if they handle these things independently, have already spent at least one night at home alone, and everything went smoothly, then they are probably ready for a vacation like this.

Regarding risky behaviors like alcohol and drug use, aggression, or promiscuity, observe how your teen behaves when going to a party, a club, or out with friends. These questions might help:

  • “In the past year, has my child come home intoxicated?”

  • “Are there any signs of drug use?”

  • “Have they been involved in fights?”

  • “Do they respect curfews?”

  • “Have we caught them lying about where they are, who they’re with, or what they’re doing?”

If the answer to these is “yes,” the teen may not yet be ready to take responsibility for an unsupervised trip.

How Do We Prepare a Teen for an Independent Vacation—What Should Be Included in This ‘Responsibility Talk’?

Preparation starts years before the actual trip. If we want to raise an independent and responsible child, it’s important to gradually give them more freedom and responsibility from an early age:

  • At 4–5 years old, let them order a sandwich by themselves while we stand nearby to help if needed.

  • At 6, stand a few meters away and let them approach the kiosk, pay, and collect the change on their own.

  • When they go on school or kindergarten trips, help them prepare their bag with minimal supervision.

  • Let them participate in outings, volunteer events, or school camps without us being present. Start with one-day trips (in early school years), then overnight trips (by the end of primary school), and finally, multi-day camps (in middle and high school).

This way, the child gradually becomes independent, learns how to manage without parental help, builds confidence, and gains valuable life experience.

Before the first solo trip, discuss potential emergencies and appropriate responses:

  • What to do if there’s a hostile group at a club

  • Who to call if someone feels unwell or if there's an altercation

  • Remind them again about moderate alcohol use and complete avoidance of drugs

  • Insist on using taxis, not getting into cars with strangers or inexperienced drivers

How Can We Talk About Safety Without Sounding Preachy or Triggering Rebellion? What Topics Shouldn’t Be Skipped—Alcohol, Drugs, Sex, Strangers, Emergencies?

These topics are crucial—and ideally, they’ve been discussed long before the first independent vacation. If this is the first time you’re talking to your teen about these things right before the trip, it likely means they’re not ready yet and the vacation should be postponed.

To avoid sounding preachy, share personal stories—what happened to you at that age, how you dealt with it, or what happened to someone you know. Ask if your teen or one of their friends has experienced something similar. Then, without giving ready-made advice, discuss together how the situation could have been avoided or how best to respond in the future.

How Do We Set Rules and Boundaries Without Undermining Trust? Is It a Good Idea to Have an “Agreement”—Like When They’ll Call, What Locations They’ll Share, etc.?

Yes, making an agreement is a great idea. It should offer some freedom and be the result of mutual negotiation:

  • “How about we check in once a day—say, between 2 and 4 PM? Would that work for you?”

  • “Would you be okay with sharing your location at night if you’re going to a club? That would really ease my mind.”

If your child is legally an adult, location sharing should be only with their explicit consent. It may otherwise feel like too much of an invasion of privacy.

How Should We React If the Teen Refuses to Follow the Agreement or Doesn’t Communicate Regularly During the Trip?

In reality, there’s not much we can do while the teen is away. But when they return, instead of punishing them (which often backfires at this age), try to talk about how you felt not knowing where they were or what they were doing. Ask about their reasons for not staying in touch and discuss what could be done differently next time—by both of you.

There could be many explanations—maybe you were calling every hour despite agreeing on one check-in per day, which may have been overwhelming, causing them to ignore the calls just to enjoy their trip.

It’s also possible that your teen doesn’t fully understand the worry their silence caused. Sharing this with them may offer valuable feedback.

Another reason might be poor organization on their part. Discuss how they could manage their time better next time to avoid missing your check-ins.

How Can We Cope With Our Own Fears and Worries When Our Child Is Away?

The first step is to accept that we’ll have these fears. When we love someone, we naturally worry. But this shouldn’t be a reason to prevent them from growing up and becoming independent—and a vacation with friends is a big step in that direction.

There’s a risk of falling in every flight—but what matters is that we’ve spent the years before this moment teaching our child how to get back up. And when they do fall, we’re here to listen and comfort them, not to scold them.

To manage our own anxiety, it helps to focus not just on the dangers, but also on the positive experiences our child is having:

  • When they call to tell a funny story—laugh with them.

  • Listen with genuine interest and curiosity about their evening, sharing in their excitement instead of treating the call like a report or inspection.

This way, not only do we ease our own anxiety, but we also create a dynamic where our teen wants to call and share experiences—which, in turn, increases their safety and reduces our stress.